Be a better listener

Listening seems simple. After all, it’s something we’re always doing. Whether it’s to the radio in your car on the way to work or your significant other telling you about how work went that day, we’re always listening. But are we listening well?

Paul Burton is the author of four books and numerous articles on productivity and time management, and the developer of QuietSpacing (www.quiet spacing.com), a customizable productivity system that helps busy people increase focus and results on the job. He says developing (and using) good listening skills allows business owners to get more out of their employees through gaining a broader understanding of their efforts.

Burton defines three levels of listening.

• Level One. This is basic listening, the kind that’s instinctual. We spend most of our time at this level listening to things and determining their significance to us. It’s completely self-absorbed. For example, when we hear a noise, we think: “How does that sound affect me?” “Is it friend or foe?”
• Level Two. This is inquisitive listening. The focus is directed outward, but the level of interest is only at the fact-gathering level. We are seeking to understand something the speaker is saying. We may say: “Then what happened?” or “After that, what do I do next?”
• Level Three. This is empathetic listening. This type of listening is directed at the speaker, but instead of just wanting to learn something, we are experiencing what they are describing. We are engaged with them, seeing what they’re describing and feeling what they are or were feeling. We may say: “That must have been exciting!” “You have certainly struggled to achieve that result.” Delivering feedback that confirms we are listening with empathy naturally aligns the speaker with us.

Most of us spend most of our day in Level One, with some time in Level Two, in which we listen as a means to an end. But when we focus on others instead of ourselves, we can achieve Level Three listening.

Burton has a few tips for becoming a better listener. It sounds easy to do, but you really do have to work at it. There are certainly plenty of distractions out there to prevent you from achieving your goal. Ask lots of questions. Let silences linger. Restrain yourself from injecting your opinion right away.

By being a better listener, you receive more feedback and your employee feels more engaged with his or her job and your company. So stop thinking about what to say next, and listen to what your employees have to say.

For more: www.quietspacing.com